Do you want your marriage to be passionate and built on mutual respect? The key to a successful relationship is effective communication. Learn how to communicate in a relationship.

Communication is the foundation of every intimate relationship. The deeper the level of communication, the stronger the bond is between you and your significant other.

The strongest marriages thrive when each person freely shares their thoughts and feelings regularly. Trust is built in your relationship when you share your heart and allow yourself to become vulnerable. Trust grows when you become that person that makes your spouse feel free to be open and vulnerable also.

A marriage relationship can bring complicated emotions for both spouses. The key is having empathy to see the other person’s point of view. If you create an atmosphere of safety and open communication, you can enjoy a close relationship even when going through the biggest hardships and challenges in life.

Follow these guidelines to successfully learn how to communicate in a relationship:

  1. Love one another above all else. Realize that being loving is more important than being right. Sometimes you need to concede when having a conflict so you can diffuse angry situations so they don’t escalate into a major confrontation.

Ways to Disagree Lovingly:

  • There are warning signs when a discussion is escalating into an argument. Maybe you’re raising your voice or inflicting harmful attacks on your spouse. When this happens, take a break and cool down. Don’t focus on all the reasons the other person is wrong, instead think about what part you might have played in the confrontation. Reverse the situation and imagine how you would feel from your spouse’s point of view.
  • After the cool down period, apologize for your part in the disagreement. In most cases, the blame is shared in an argument. At this point, you can calmly express your feelings to one another.
  • Don’t risk pointing blame at your partner. Instead, talk about how things have affected you. Consider the discussion to be two partners trying to resolve the problem, rather than two enemies that must defeat each other at all costs.
  1. Compromising is not a symbol of defeat. It is a valuable way to keep the peace in relationship. Aim toward finding a win-win solution in every situation. When encountering a disagreement, consider how both of you can get what you want and need.

How to Compromise:

  • If you both give in a little to find a middle ground, it shows that you’re both committed to the relationship above all else. You show your love for your spouse in a meaningful way when you sacrifice a little of what you want for the good of both of you.
  1. Listen Attentively. Many arguments are caused by not listening effectively and empathetically to your partner. If you practice listening to your partner, you will have less disagreements and you will have a better marriage with mutual respect and love for each other.

What it Means to Listen Attentively:

  • Don’t interrupt when the other person is speaking. Don’t think about what you’re going to say to respond when you should be paying close attention to your spouse’s concerns. When your partner is finished, try to recap their feelings in your own words. For example, say, “What I heard you saying is… Is that right?”
  • This allows your partner to correct your understanding of what was said. It also shows your empathy for listening to your spouse’s point of view. It is a good way to show that you care about their feelings and finding a solution instead of just winning the argument. This will lead to a quicker resolution and greater emotional intimacy that both of you can be happy with.

Aim toward embracing difficult conversations as an opportunity to strengthen your relationship and show your spouse how much you care. Consider how you would feel you’re your spouse’s perspective, find a way that you both can be happy, and let go of the need to be right. If you learn how to communication in a relationship, you’ll experience a much closer marriage relationship that can survive adversity and last a lifetime.

 

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Suggested Workbook:

Love More, Fight Less: Communication Skills Every Couple Needs: A Relationship Workbook for Couples